Creativity Gave Me My Life Back
Hi there! I've been horrible about writing blog posts because frankly, I'm a horrible writer. Perhaps that's why I'm a photographer... I love telling stories, but with images and not words. So if you're an english teacher looking for loads of grammatical errors, you've come to the right place!
Since it's a New Year, I'd like to start by introducing myself. My name is Jenny and among many hats I wear, I'm a mother, wife, and business owner. I live in the gorgeous state of California and most likely will never move to another state. I love it here too much to ever move.
So back to the reason for this blog... When did I lose my life? You see, for the majority of my adult life I've had to deal with anxiety and panic attacks. It first reared its ugly head in my early 20's after graduating college. I remember my first encounter. I was driving home from work on the freeway and I felt as if I was having a heart attack and going to die. right. then. and. there. I pulled over and called 911 for myself for the first time in my life. Later they discharged me and told me I simply had a panic attack.
Years passed and I learned to live with it. After all, it wasn't going to kill me so I should be able to just handle it. So I thought.
I had my first child in 2012 and didn't realize I had postpartum depression (PPD)/ anxiety. No one told me that my depressed mood and crying spells were indications of PPD. I thought it was totally normal. I'm suppose to cry when I look at my baby right? Or when I'm sitting in my room? Or in the shower? ... No? Well, I didn't know any better.
It wasn't until December of 2013 that I finally had it with anxiety and reached out for help. I saw professionals that knew how to help me and I spent the next year on an amazing journey of self realization and fulfillment.
So how did creativity give me my life back? Along with the support of my family, I found my passion, and it was photography. I've always loved photography, but it wasn't until I fully and intentionally jumped into living creatively (and officially starting Jenny Quicksall Photography) that I finally felt like myself again. The happy, energetic, bubbly Jenny, who loves life and can't get enough of being around people.
There's something about being behind the camera and pouring my heart into a moment and an instance to create an image, that takes my mind and soul into a happy place. It's almost like a trance. All the noise and the everyday minutia just disappears into the background and the only thing I'm concentrating on is creating beautiful images of moments and details that are right in front of me.
When I'm taking your photographs, I'm entirely in that moment with you, experiencing the feelings and emotions with you. Fully engrossed in my responsibilities of creating beautiful images for you. And I'm thinking of little to nothing else.
It's a freeing sensation for sure and I can't get enough of it.
I hope that this post has shed a light into why I chose to live creatively and specifically my passion for photography. And hope that this post helps anyone living with anxiety to know that it is possible to break free from it and come out the other side with a renewed sense of purpose.
With love and gratitude,
Photo credit to my friend Paulina Johnson.